How Much Coffee Is Too Much Coffee

You don’t sweat, you percolate.
Your life’s goal is to amount to a hill of beans.
When someone says, “How are you?”, you say, “Good to the last drop.”
You’d be willing to spend time in a Turkish prison.
Your coffee mug is insured by Lloyds of London.
Juan Valdez named his donkey after you.
You grind your coffee beans in your mouth.
You’ve worn out the handle on your favorite mug.
Starbucks owns the mortgage on your house.
Instant coffee takes too long.
You have a picture of your coffee mug on your coffee mug.
You don’t tan, you roast.
You soak your dentures in coffee overnight.
Your first-aid kit contains two pints of coffee with an I.V. hookup.

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